Tackling Performance Anxiety

How To Treat Performance Anxiety?

Sex is riddled with ideas of how it should go. Everything from porn and pop culture to conversations with friends reinforces ideas about sex and performance that aren’t helpful. Everything from ‘size matters’ and ‘it’s how you use it’ to shameful names like 2-minute Noodle reinforce our ideas of how sex should be. We’re conditioned to believe that having 10-inch equipment, Ken doll physique, and the endurance of a cross-country racehorse is the norm for desirable and sexually successful men.

But the norms of sex are constantly in flux, and today is no exception. More and more, the meaning of sex isn’t exclusive to penetrative intercourse. With so many forms of sexual intimacy and ways to please being normalised, the criteria for an attractive and sexually desirable man are evolving. Despite this, having faced conservative, narrow-minded ideals of what a manly man should be, takes its toll. To say the least, all that pressure can be a downer – literally. We’re talking performance anxiety.

What Is Performance Anxiety?

Performance anxiety put simply is stress about sex. It can dampen your sex life by turning sex from something sensual and energising that you look forward to, into something worrying that you dread. Your head fills with self-doubt, and in some cases, you may have difficulty getting it up, or you may even experience premature ejaculation, because of the psychological stress you’re under.

Why Does Performance Anxiety Happen?

Common causes of performance anxiety and related erectile dysfunction are poor self-image, feeling like you can’t please your partner, and low self-esteem due to ED, premature or delayed ejaculation, or failure to orgasm. External stress like work, family, and financial stress can impact performance anxiety as well.

When you’re under stress, your body triggers your sympathetic nervous system. In this state, you’re essentially in survival mode, and blood is directed towards your inner organs and away from your appendages, including your penis. So essentially, the psychological stress of performance anxiety sparks a physical response from your body, that can affect your erections and ejaculations.

How Common Is It?

You’ll be relieved to know that performance anxiety is normal. You and your member are not alone in this. Erectile dysfunction and sexual performance anxiety are both common conditions. 60% of men experience ED by the age of 60 and sexual performance anxiety affects up to 25% of men.

So What Can You Do About Performance Anxiety?

If you’re noticing sex gives you more butterflies than it used to, there are a number of options for you.

Firstly, you’ll need to define the reason for your performance anxiety. You can successfully diagnose and motivate your member with the help of our bespoke ED treatment plans. All you need to do is complete the online doctor’s consultation, and a doctor will contact you to discuss your options.

Performance anxiety treatment can range from medication to therapy, and even some tricks you can do at home to improve your confidence. Guided imagery is a technique that reduces performance anxiety by encouraging arousal and focussing on maintaining it through vivid story telling of successful sexual encounters. Fun, right?

Jacobson’s relaxation technique is another form of therapy that focusses on engaging and loosening targeted muscle groups to reduce stress and improve your awareness of sensations throughout your body. When coupled with guided imagery, you may have a winning recipe for a steamy and saucy sex life.

Final Thoughts

When it comes to sex, reaching the finish line early, late, or not at all is normal every once in a while, but if you’re regularly feeling overwhelmed or struggling to get there, seeking help should be a priority. Not only will it pin down the cause of your problems, but it will also put things on the up, if you know what we mean. And the sooner that happens, the better.


The articles published by &BAM are for informational purposes only and do not constitute medical advice. If you have any medical questions or concerns, you should contact your doctor.



  1. https://www.healthline.com/health/erectile-dysfunction/performance-anxiety-erectile-dysfunction https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2050052119300745
  2. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3012223/pdf/IJPsy-26-160.pdf
  3. https://www.healthline.com/health/what-is-jacobson-relaxation-technique#wholebody-technique